Saturday, November 12, 2011

It's a Fudd World After All

This is the kind of situation that elitist 'Fudds' like 'Citizen Dave' dream of for the US.
As more and more Chinese begin to explore the pleasures of the countryside, some 200 hunting clubs have sprung up in the past few years. Many offer little more than the chance for tourists to fire a live weapon; guns have been strictly controlled on the mainland since the Communists came to power in 1949.

Some, however, cater to wealthy Chinese who have also started travelling to Africa in search of big game, and 14 species of animals can be legally hunted on the Chinese mainland, according to the government.

Private hunting clubs for the 'elite' so they don't have to worry about the unwashed masses disturbing their hobby. Heaven.

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Milwaukee Police Retaliation?

Milwaukee police, who's bosses are members of MAIG and IACP, seem intent on wasting tax dollars and getting themselves sued.

A woman using a WiFi connection outside of a business (w/ permission) and Open Carrying is arrested for "loitering and prowling, and resisting or obstructing an officer". She just happens to have successfully sued the city for wrongful arrest last year.

No surprise when the Chief of Police issued this edict after a similar situation:
My message to my troops is if you see anybody carrying a gun on the streets of Milwaukee, we’ll put them on the ground, take the gun away and then decide whether you have a right to carry it.
Sounds more like it was an arrest for "Contempt of Cop".

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Friday, November 11, 2011

Fender benders & gun fights

For anyone who has wasted their time reading my posts here on DOOT knows that most of my recent stuff is satire. If you can’t tell which of my posts are honest accounts versus which are satire, you probably shouldn’t be visiting this site in the first place. Nor should you be allowed to own sharp objects, vote or have children.

But in the spirit of people warning me(numerous times) to post a “spew alert” before I share my brand of humor, I thought it might be necessary to inform readers when I’m actually telling them something real.

This is real.

I stop by the grocery store after work today to buy wet cat food, kitty litter, Walla Walla onions, green beans, potatoes and some calamari.

That’s what the recipe said I needed. See, that part there is satire, the rest is real.

So I’m at the checkout and every employee is either looking outside the front window or peeking outside the door into the parking lot. One of them comes back in walking alongside a woman who looks to be in her mid-sixties, approaches to within 2 feet of where I’m standing and gets on the intercom and requests that the person who owns a black Honda Accord come to the front of the store.

I calmly replied, “I’m already here.”

The woman immediately apologized and informed me that she just backed into my car, damaging my fender.

“I do have insurance so we can take care of this once you’re done paying for your groceries.”, she said.

She looked me straight in the eye and spoke with a demeanor that told me she was good people.

I asked her if anyone was hurt.

She said, “No, I wasn’t going very fast.”

I told her I wasn’t overly concerned because my car has over 250,000 miles on it. Not really worth getting insurance companies involved.

She insisted that I inspect the damage before making any decisions.

So I grab my groceries and open the door for her to exit. We walk out and she points out the “damage.”

I have some white paint scrapes on my bumper, not my fender. No dents, no nothing. I bend down, wipe off the paint scrape with my sleeve and stand up to face her.

I said, “I’ll tell ya what, if you give me a hug, we’ll call it good.”

She hugged me like I was one of her own Grandkids and said Thank You.

I told her to have a nice weekend and we parted ways.

In the eyes of the gun-grabbers, I should have shot her in the face, killed the other occupants of her car, slaughtered all the witnesses in the store, walked across the street and shot up the elementary school and then launched into a vitriolic triad about homosexuals and “dark people” while looking for government agents to snipe off.

But I printed out this recipe for battered calamari at work today and it sounded especially yummy.
The moral of the story is something the antis will never fathom. We are armed and walking amongst you every day. You pass us on the sidewalk. You sit next to us at the theater. You order appetizers while we’re ordering mains. You read our bumper stickers at the stop light.

And if your lucky, you might even back into our vehicles and get a big ol’ fat bear hug which puts a smile on your face and gives you a good story to tell when you get home, safe and sound.

This is real.



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A Note To Abby Spangler

Facebook 'Likes' /= 'Members'.

Just sayin'.



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Thursday, November 10, 2011

Never Let A Tragedy Go Unexploited

Man allegedly commits suicide at OWS Burlington, VT.

Mayor's response:

Firearms are not allowed in City Hall Park. Kiss said the shooting raises questions about the easy availability of firearms.

“We need to reflect on guns in Vermont,” he said.
Oh, look. Mayor Bob Kiss is a member of MAIG.

There is no level to low for these lowlifes to try and restrict firearms.

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'Gun Violence' and Brady Campaign Tweets..

The Brady Campaign Intern has his Twitter search function set to 'gun violence' and retweets practically every one that comes across w/o looking at the story or doing any research. Five minutes found out some glaring details:

'Horrible', 'Tragic'. A 13yo boy. An innocent child cut down in the prime of his life. But what MAIG Mayor Adams and the Brady's don't bother to mention is this, from another article on the murder:
At the time of his death, Marquez was on juvenile probation for an assault. But that didn't keep him from boasting on his Facebook page, under the moniker "Ese Stoner," about his affiliation with the Surenos gang, smoking marijuana with friends, and his journey in and out of juvenile detention this year. On Saturday, he posted, "I love gang bangin violence!" The next night at 8:16 p.m., his last post, he wrote he had fun looking for someone "but their (sic) lucky they were hiding."
And another:
From the article:
Chris headed to the Miami Gardens "candy house." He was dead within minutes. Neighbors didn't hear yelling or arguing before the shooting. He was shot twice in the head and twice in the chest. "My guess is he probably just stopped off to buy a joint," his mom says.
That evil media. To think that a 'troubled youth' getting killed outside of a violent drug den isn't newsworthy.

Do we see a trend here? Are these the kinds of individuals the Brady Campaign really wants to defend? Of course what we will see are these incidents added to the list of 'children' killed by guns.

It took me less time to find details on these stories than it did to type up this post. So is the Brady Campaign deliberately trying to skew these incidents or are they just to lazy to do any research on them? Or both.

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Give Them What They Want and They Won't Hurt You

Really, it's true:
Virginia Perillo, 73, was found with traumatic head injuries at her home in the 3300 block of S. Parnell, according to the Cook County Medical Examiner’s office.
And the scum who did it?
He was paroled in May after serving 13 years of a 30-year sentence on attempted murder and aggravated arson charges, records show. He was also sentenced to six years in prison for armed robbery in 1993.
6 months w/o getting caught committing another crime. He was on a roll. Good thing we can rely on the Gov't and police to protect us.

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Vote For THE Voice of McDonald's

McDonald's is running a singing contest for its employees and a friend of the family is a contestant. She's an Air Force Vet and has an amazing voice.

Go vote for her HERE. Oh and you can vote multiple times.

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'Geriatric Militia' Plead Not Guilty

No surprise. By the time this actually goes to trial, likely most of them will be dead anyway.

This line brings the funny:
Federal investigators said they had them under surveillance for at least seven months, infiltrating their meetings at a Waffle House, homes and other places, before finally arresting them last week.
"We're going to blow up the Gov't"

"More coffee hun?"

"Yes, please, w/ some Ricin on the side if you don't mind"

"Sure hun, not a problem."
Yeah. These guys were dangerous.

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Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Stupid Gun Control Idea #985

I know, 'stupid' and 'gun control' in the same sentence is redundant but this winning strategy always makes me giggle when I hear it:
If Americans want to cripple the NRA, we need to mount a membership campaign, urging millions of our fellow citizens to join the NRA, and then voting into office reasonable people who would be willing to work with congress and the states to enact reasonable gun ownership laws. In other words, co-opt the NRA and drive the right-wing loonies out of power.
Now in reality land, an average voting tally for the NRA board is about 100K give or take and you have to be a 5yr+ or life+ member to even be eligible.

Anti's can't even get 100K people to join their OWN organizations total, never mind convincing that many or 'millions' to join the NRA and take it over.

No wonder they haven't had a significant victory in over a decade.

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The Ol' Grey Lady is Senile

You have to love 'Authorized Journalist' Doublespeak.

I want to be clear: the New York Times editorial board does not oppose gun ownership. We believe the Second Amendment confers a communal right on Americans to own guns – not an individual one. But that’s actually a smaller point than you might think. All we really want are sensible restrictions based on public safety and common sense.
Yeah, forget two Supreme Court decisions, these 'journalists' know better. 'Sensible restrictions' meaning handgun and semi-auto bans, registration, restrictive licensing, etc.

The New York Times is a prime example of why print media is dying.

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Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Zero Guns = Zero Crime?

Patrick at "Where Angels Fear to Tread" highlights a winning quote from Brady Campaign/Protect Minnesota Board Member Joan Peterson. In it she proclaims that criminals COULD NOT commit crimes w/o a gun:
gang mem­bers, drug car­tels, felons, rob­bers and those who, with­out a gun, could not do their jobs.
That's right. The first crimes were committed w/ the invention of the firearm. There have been no beatings, stabbings, poisonings, robberies, etc. w/o the use of a firearm.

They really are this deranged about guns.

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