Wednesday, July 22, 2015

To: All Readers

It has been brought to the blog owner's attention that some individuals have been using foul language in the course of normal posting between commenters.  Due to complaints from some of the more easily offended readers, this conduct can no longer be tolerated.

The blog owners do however realize the importance of each person being able to properly express his/her feelings when communicating with their fellow readers.  Therefore, the blog owners have compiled the following code phrases so that the proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in the proud DOOT tradition.

OLD PHRASE                                                 NEW PHRASE

No Fucking Way!                                              I'm not certain that's feasible.

You've got to be shitting me.                              Really?

Tell someone who gives a fuck.                          Perhaps you should check with......

Ask me if I give a fuck.                                      Of course I'm concerned.

It's not my fucking problem.                               I wasn't involved in that project.

What the fuck?                                                  Interesting behavior.

Fuck it, it won't work.                                       I'm not sure I can implement that.

Why the fuck didn't you tell me sooner.              I'll try to schedule that.

When the fuck do you expect me to do this?      Perhaps I can work late. 

Who the fuck cares?                                         Are you sure it's a problem?

He's got his head up his ass.                              He's not familiar with the problem.

Eat shit.                                                            You don't say?

Eat shit and die.                                                Excuse me?

What the fuck do they want from my life?          The weren't happy with it?

Kiss my ass.                                                     So you'ld like my help with it?

Fuck it, I'm on salary.                                       I'm a bit overloaded at the mom
Shove it up your ass.                                        I don't think you understand.

This job sucks.                                                 I love a challenge.

Who the hell died and made you boss?             You want me to take care of this?

Blow me.                                                          I see.

Blow yourself.                                                   Do you see?

Another fucking meeting.                                   Yes. we should discuss this.

I really don't give a shit.                                     I don't think it will be a problem.

Fuck you.                                                        How nice. How very, very nice!

Thank you for your understanding in our attempts to promote Reasoned Discourse amongst our readership.

The DOOT blog team.

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Monday, July 20, 2015

A Package Full Of Gamer Hate

Just in time to hand them out at GenCon

I only had 5 left of my original order from years ago, three of which autographed.  At least one of which is promised to try and divert my painter friend from his evil hobby. I went to look to see if they were still in print.  Lo and behold they were.

Today in the mail I received an envelope w/ this return address:

My true gamer friends now probably have confirmed their suspicions of what I'm talking about.

I opened the envelope and true joy fell out. THE holy grail of 80's era gamer hatred.  Of course I'm speaking of:


Yes, 100 brand new copies although they are subtly different from the 2nd ed. ones (yeah, I did that intentionally) that were the same as 1st Ed. w/ the exception of removing references to Tolkein and C.S. Lewis as occult figures.

If you have never read or heard of 'Dark Dungeons' before, that means that #1, you don't read my site often enough, and #2, that you absolutely must. Here is the first panel:

Page 2

Then go here and read the rest. As a friendly warning, do NOT be drinking anything while you're reading it.

They also have made a movie of it which is insanely true to the comic.  Here's the trailer:

Then go here and buy the digital full version.  It is entirely worth it, especially if you watch it w/ subtitles on.

Methinks this weekend is going to be a little Gamer history lesson for the spawnlings as well as some presents to my regular group.

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