Monday, February 23, 2009

Mother Nature is a wicked bitch.

Just some randon thoughts on self defense as a natural Right. This poor little pooch thought it would be jolly good fun to bite a porcupine.






Maybe someone should rub his nose in some porcupine while firmly saying "bad dog" to teach him a lesson.


Skunks have no natural enemies in the wild. Speaking as someone who has literally "caught liquid" from a skunk, I can understand why.


Rattlesnakes will give you an audible warning if you venture too close and have the means to back it up if that warning goes unheeded. Think of as brandishing a loaded weapon.


At some point in the past, one of our ancestors used poison ivy as toilet paper and thus became the world's first botanist. I also surmise that this was the genesis of what we now know as "The triple dog dare."


The armadillo, the electric ell, the stinging nettle.


Armor fangs, claws, poison, speed, camoflauge, or simple brute bone-crushing force.

My personal favorite is mimicry. More on that tomorrow when I get better at formatting pictures. Sorry for the random snake photo.


What's your favorite example of self defense amongst the "lower life forms?"




9 comments:

Anonymous said...

That snake is not venomous. Red on black it's a scarlet kingsnake. Red on yellow is a coral snake and thats the one that will kill you. Or are you going to use that as an example of mimicry?

Joe Allen said...

Maybe someone should rub his nose in some porcupine while firmly saying "bad dog" to teach him a lesson.

I sincerely doubt that that will be necessary. Which is why the porcupine's quill is so much more effective a deterrent than an order of protection, or a short jail term.

That pooch is just lucky he tangled with nature's equivalent of pepper spray instead of the rattler's double-aught buck.

Anonymous said...

"What's your favorite example of self defense amongst the "lower life forms?"

Filibusters.

kaveman said...

Shawn...very true, you saw where I'm going with the king/coral connection. The king snake gains a benefit from just looking like the coral snake. Don't worry, you didn't ruin tomorrow's post, I still have a twist to add.

This is how I learned it,

If read touches black, you're all right Jack.

If red touches yellow, you're a dead fellow.

Joe, this dog actually survived and made a full recovery. Lucky pooch.

Molon, we might have to sit down some day with a few beers and have a snark-fest. Touche!

Unknown said...

Some favorites would have to be the Moses Sole (taste so bad even a shark won't eat you).

Chameleon, who can forget the "I blend into my background" guy.

Bombadier Beetle...I mean, some people's farts reek. But when you've got an explosive acidic combination. You're armed for self defense.

Anonymous said...

I would be honored to swim in the same snark-infested waters as you, kaveman. The beers would just be icing on the cake!

DJMooreTX said...

Box Jelly.

It's a blob of translucent, living slime.

It will kill you, or at least cause excruciating pain, simply for brushing against it.

They're essentially invisible, and you don't actually have to attack them, or try to eat them, to get stung.

Heck, they can't remotely even try to eat you.

Then there's the Humboldt Squid, more than 100 lbs of man-eating muscle. The suckers have teeth -- in effect, these beasts have a couple of thousand mouths.
They're large enough that if they get you, they will essentially rip you apart.

NotClauswitz said...

Dog looks like a bull terrier - they like to mix it up!

Anonymous said...

What's your favorite example of self defense amongst the "lower life forms?"

A broken bottle of cheap wine.