Wednesday, April 8, 2015

Hangin w/ Rand Paul

So the other day Rand and I were out on the back porch drinking some brandy and discussing his upcoming campaign.  He asks when I'm going to donate and I tell him to pop me an email w/ a link.  He says "Cool, I'll get right on it.".  Well apparently it got caught in the spam trap and I didn't see it so Rand got all concerned and jumped on his staff to get it taken care of.
From: Rand Paul []
Sent: Wednesday, April 8th, 2015 7:28 AM
Subject: Roy's donation

Alexandra --

Can you please follow up with Roy?

I've sent two emails regarding our "Stand with Rand" Money Bomb and haven't heard back.

The great news is we're over $650,000 raised, but we need to keep going.

I'm counting on Roy's support, so please send an email right away.

With their support, we can defeat the Washington machine and take our country back.

In Liberty,

Well Alexandra emailed me all worried:


Rand asked me to email you.

Is everything ok?

He announced his candidacy for President of the United States, and I know he is counting on your support for the campaign's "Stand with Rand" Money Bomb.

The entire political world is watching this Money Bomb and it's vital this effort be as successful as possible.

They know a big Money Bomb for Senator Paul means the Washington machine's Big Government, big spending days are numbered.

To get Senator Paul's campaign off the ground and running, he's going to have to post a fundraising total that makes heads spin.

And he is counting on your support to make it happen.

However, our records show you haven't made a contribution.

Oh yeah, I'll take care of that right away.  Can't let my buddy Rand hang, right?

I'm sure several others of you have gotten worried emails like this after your garden parties w/ Rand.   These apparently came from 'Paramount Communication Group'.  Some have suggested, based off of the names used in the header, that this may have come from an NAGR email list.  All I know is that this company should go back to calling senile 80 yr olds for their bank account numbers because the only thing this accomplished was that I won't support the Rand Paul campaign. 

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Anonymous said...

You are expected to give a contribution to whoever you end up backing. Hillary, Jeb Bush, whoever.

Erin Palette said...

I'm far more annoyed with the fact that they used your name twice (likely using $name) and then in the last paragraph they used "their" as a gender-neutral singular adjective.

It would have worked just as well, and be grammatically correct, to have said "With Roy's support."

I, for one, refuse to send money to any campaign that cannot demonstrate proper knowledge of English!

Anonymous said...

Hell, me and rand wus drinking Coronas and hasslin' bitches in South Beach juss a couple of weekends ago. I showed him my gatt and he went OG with the Chopper he carries in his limo...

Yep, I got the same BS mass mailing and he ain't getting any money from me. I paid for the Coronas.

Anonymous said...

Well we have not had any face time over beverages yet ,but I got an autographed pic in the mail Monday. Oh yeah along with several emails asking for direly needed contributions. His staff really needs to do their research better before asking for help. I agree with a lot of his positions but, and I mean but, I have to draw the line over his stand on Union dues automatic withdrawals and Right to work rules. I am a Union president of a Fire Fighters Local and really look hard at candidates who are down on Unions.

Anonymous said...

Anon, yeah, it's crazy people wanting to keep their money.
Can't wait for your pension to disappear.