I will be the next CEO at Brady

So I applied for the job as chief turd at the Brady Bunch. I thought I'd share my kick-ass resume in order to benefit those who don't know how to massage their skill set and work experience into something that exudes pure awesomeness.

An Opportunity under Consideration...
You have expressed interest in the following opportunity:
CEO
Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence
Opportunity: DE452
(You responded on Oct 2, 2011)

Introduction:

Greetings, my name is Mike Hawk and I would be honored to be considered for the position of CEO of the Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence. Let me tell you straight up, Mike Hawk is what you're looking for. You will love and embrace Mike Hawk. My former business will be sad to see Mike Hawk leave, but Mike Hawk is always looking for a new challenge. I hope the Brady Campaign will be Mike Hawk's next endeavor.

Career History:
1989-1991...Lead shovel-man of horse feces on a small farm. I was also the resident expert on collecting chicken crap, pig poop, and cow patties along with a wide variety of urine soaked hay. I dabbled in animal husbandry a bit until my employer found out and fired me. After that I took a few years off to smoke weed.

2000-2006...Scored a major hook-up at McDonalds making the fries and cleaning the toilets. I got so efficient at it that I could do both at the same time. My manager failed to see the brilliance of using raw potatoes and their natural acidity to sterilize the skid marks on the seats and they fired me.

2006-present…I got a job where I get wheel-barrels full of cash to post offensive and untruthful comments on Huffington Post articles. It’s a pretty easy gig but it’s kinda boring. I’d much rather spout offensive and untruthful comments on a National level, hence my interest in the Brady Campaign.

Education:
I’m the smartest most awesome intellect the universe has ever produced. Anyone who thinks otherwise is an idiot of the highest order.

Certifications:
I am 100% certified awesome.

Languages:
Yes, I speak language. I occasionally read language as well but I prefer picture books.

International Experience:

I have had sexual relations with Arabian Horses, Chinese Crested dogs, African hippos, Canadian Moose, Mexican cacti and British women. Ya, Mike Hawk is that awesome.

Geographic preference:
Uh, earth?

Compensation:
I am willing to perform the duties of CEO for your organization for minimum wage and a few photos of Sarah Brady in a thong and an unlimited supply of Kleenex.


Thank you for considering me for this opportunity. I sincerely believe that when you measure my qualifications against all the hordes of others applying for this position, you will come to the inescapable conclusion that Mike Hawk will be on top.

This (And Last) Week on DOOT

• Weekend Wildlife
• Friday Night Self Promotion
• WAVE Lying to Lose
• DIE ZOMBIE MEME DIE!!!!!!
• Selective Outrage
• Blogiversary
• Why Are Gun Control Activists So Violent?
• Guilty until proven innocent
• 'Authorized Journalists' 'Race to the Bottom' in I...
• Accuracy = Racism?
• Does the NYPD have MANPAD's?*
• Note to Dennis Henigan
• GRPC '11 Roundup & Thoughts
• Making Sarah Brady cry.
• GRPC '11 Day 3: Conference & ISRA AM

• GRPC '11 Day 2: Conference
• GRPC '11 Day 1: Setup & Reception
• Heading out to GRPC
• WAVE Goodbye
• Who Speaks For Chicago Residents?
• A Tale of Two Conferences
• Gov't Motors (GM)/OnStar Will Track Your Car All T...
• Brady Campaign, Now Officially Irrelevant in DC
• Some Stupid Can Be Duct-taped
• Gun Rights Policy Conference (GRPC) This Weekend
• Guns in Church? Why Would We Need That?
• Did Brady hire a new CEO or give up?
• Weekend Wildlife

Weekend Wildlife

Had the camera out last week in a spot I haven't used for awhile. Since I had my SD cards w/ me for the conference, the on camera memory only held a few but they had some good ones.




Grazing.













I love the sky in this one.












Spike and friend














Big Boy startled.












Gorillas Deer in the Mist

Friday Night Self Promotion

So it's Friday night and I feel like a little bit of narcissism. If you are on Facebook, you can follow DOOT there:

Follow this blog

DOOT is also on Twitter:



If you like Blogspot, there is a 'Followers' link on the left hand side about halfway down, just below the original 'Networked Blogs' link.

So be a man (or woman) and have the courage to follow Days of our Trailers.

Or don't. It's Friday, you should be out w/ your family and/or shooting.

WAVE Lying to Lose

After months of PSH resulting in a net loss for their campaign to keep Wisconsin-ites defenseless, the Joyce puppet WAVE flat out lies in order to retain any semblance of influence:

Bonavia says they are calling on businesses to ban guns from being carried inside. She says similar steps have been taken by about 80-percent of the businesses in other states that allow concealed carry.

HorseSh!t. I mean come on. Unless they think that noone in their state travels anywhere outside of the borders, they have to know that is flat out nonsense. So why would they make a claim like that?

Oh right. The only thing they can do is lie.

H/t to Stephen Wright

DIE ZOMBIE MEME DIE!!!!!!

Another one of those devil spawned, undead e-mail forwards seems to be making a resurgence. This is the one where George Soros is buying up all the firearm/ammo companies in the US so he can shut them down. It goes something like this:

Some people worry that this Freedom Group is going to control most of the firearms companies in the United States.

If you control the manufacturers you can decide to stop selling to civilians.What a perfect way to control guns.

Now if you do somedigging you will see that The Freedom Group is owned
by a company called Cerberus Capital Management. Guess who controls
Cerberus??? GEORGE SOROS !!!!!!!!! One of the most evil men on this
planet who wants to restrict or ban all civilian guns.

Please pass this on to all your freedom loving friends. This needs to come out.

Why have we not heard about this in the "mainstream" media? I would think this would be BIG news.

Freedom Group owns a ton of firearm and ammo manufacturers. True

FG is owned by Cerberus. True

Soros owns Cerberus. False or at least highly improbable and unable to be confirmed.

Cerberus was started and is owned by Stephen Feinberg. No reputable sources I have found (ie WSJ, Businessweek, etc. ) list Soros in any way connected to Cerberus. Most are just blogs or message board comments copy/pasting the same or similar 'warnings' like the one above. Occasionally a few 'Soros & Feinberg' statements have been added to them to give them some credibility.

The warnings themselves started as email forwards in late '09/early 2010 when FG attempted to go public w/ stock and they bought up Barnes Bullets.

So while Soros IS out to get your guns through IANSA, it's not through Cerberus or Freedom Group.

Selective Outrage

Ladd Everitt of the CSGV tweeted about a man arrested in MI who had 4K lbs of explosives and allegedly made 'anti-gov't statements' using a quote located nowhere in the linked article.

No mention, however, of this event, an MA individual planning on blowing up the Pentagon, Capitol building, and as many Americans as he can, arrested by the FBI after accepting delivery of guns and explosives.

So what qualifies one to be an 'insurrectionist' as per the CSGV if nut #2 hasn't made the cut?

Blogiversary

I've been writing this crap for four years now and you all have been reading it. Don't any of you have lives?

Why Are Gun Control Activists So Violent?

A comment received on Huffpo:

Gun education with live ammo should be taught before potty training. Logo branded holsters with .25 cal automatics for small hands should be seen as a fashion statement in kindergarten. Tasers should be allowed to help kids "tag" each other in playground games. The faster this herd culls itself, the better.

Desiring the violent death of children. Stay classy Anti's.

Guilty until proven innocent

And then you're still guilty.

'Authorized Journalists' 'Race to the Bottom' in Intelligence

Take a look at the majority of anti-gun leaning op-ed's over the last week or so. You'll notice a phrase in common. "Race to the bottom".

A phrase conveniently used by the Joyce/Soros funded 'Media Matters' in an article dated Sep. 12th and which has been spread among the journo-sphere like an e-mail from Bill Gates promising you money to hit 'Forward'.

At least they make it easy to know where they get their talking points from.